Holding It Lightly

Mary Sievers

We’ve found ourselves still living in the midst of a global pandemic. Death tolls rise and restrictions remain. And yet, God, too, is steadfast. What is God revealing to you so you know he is Trustworthy, Beautiful, and Good? 

The past six months have been a time that the Lord has used to reveal idols, and do the work of “chipping away” at them. When we are stripped of our comforts and our control, idols become evident quickly. I thrive on routine and a schedule. With a personality that strongly resembles the “Enneagram 3 – Achiever” profile, I prefer to have all of the details, desire that situations occur in reality the same way they do in my mind, and shy away from spontaneous plans. When I slip into worshipping this idol of control, my heart grows rapidly weary.

Seemingly overnight in March, the majority of our plans were put on indefinite hold. I stopped crossing things off of our calendar and quit looking at one all together (I’m pretty sure March had 72 days this year). I felt discouraged as benchmark dates passed and uncertainty loomed large. But God, in the midst of what often felt like a thick cloud of disappointment, gave my soul relief from a schedule that had been far too busy, one that did not allow for true soul rest.

Since that time, God revealed His goodness and His majesty, over and over again: remote work schedules and cancelled sports commitments gave us the gift of time. Time to take family walks on our property, to sit around a campfire and debate the qualities of a perfectly roasted marshmallow (slow roasted, golden brown, gooey on the inside, for some – charred on the outside and barely warm on the inside, for others), creek walking, and discovering rhythms of stillness and rest.

As the community around us continues to “re-open”, I am able to hold loosely to our schedule, knowing that tomorrow could look completely different than our penciled-in plans (if it does, maybe it will hold more time for cozy blankets and hot coffee). Cancelled ball games create time to cook a healthy meal at home, and time to gather people around our table.

In the moments that I forget to trust in God’s goodness and recognize that my heart is weary, I am reminded of James 4:13-15,

“Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit — yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” 

Whatever tomorrow may hold, God’s plans are greater than our own; unwavering, and certain. He is steadfast. Whatever our desires for tomorrow, God’s plans are greater – for His glory and our good.